This GOP Cornstalk Is About to Get Husked

Politicians love to salute the flag and say stuff like “Never Forget,” but they are total phonies every election when it comes to “leaving no man behind.” That’s because one of the biggest traditions in Congress is to abandon your friends whenever their campaigns turn south, which is exactly what the GOP is doing to Rep. Rod Blum [IA-1].

Rod Blum FML

The Congressional Leadership Fund (CLF), which is the House Republican Party’s emergency bank account, has basically thrown Rep. Blum’s campaign off the lifeboat to drown in the Blue Wave. This is probably because Paul Ryan and his money bag friends read publications like The Chicago Tribune and Roll Call, which have been poll-shaming Blum all year for being the “most vulnerable” member of Congress.

ryan weights one

Ordinarily, I would not put a lot of stock in what the “experts” say; but when I review the facts, I realize that they are probably on to something:

— FACT: Iowans in Rep. Blum’s district might enjoy sitting on their porch and watching corn grow, but they do not enjoy giving their Congressman a free pass when they think that the President is a douchebag.

— FACT: Iowa-1 booted its last Republican incumbent when Nancy Pelosi put on a clinic for how to totally dominate an unpopular GOP President during the 2006 midterms.

— FACT: In 2014, those same voters kicked-out Democrat Rep. Bruce Braley because they, along with with everyone in America who didn’t own a vagina hat, were tired of President Barack Obama.

— FACT: This district is rated D+1.

— FACT: Donald Trump is a douchebag.

scooby doo 2

Hold on to your butt, Scooby Doo! It looks like when people get tired of the President, these Iowans get tired of their Congressman. So naturally, I’m betting “NO,” Rep. Blum can’t hold this seat.

blum mkt

I’m not just copying Paul Ryan and the CLF when I make this bet, I’m copying the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee (DCCC). Those winners at liberal HQ pulled their ads in support of Democrat Abby Finkenauer in September because Blum was already toast. Clearly, the only people who think that Rep. Blum can win this race are the ones being paid to. I’m buying NO, he can’t hold this seat.

APPENDIX FOR PICKY PEOPLE:

Some of you will come at me and say that this take is fake news because Paul Ryan dropped some cash into IA-1 lately; and the DCCC has responded with an ad buy of its own.

Dummies think this means that Republicans want to fight and die on this hill. This is completely wrong because first of all, Iowa doesn’t have any hills; and second of all, a few ads on local TV does not equal a political cage match. Remember, the Blue Wave is being powered by a never-ending supply of cash that will hopefully drown Donald Trump. A million bucks to appease a candidate is nothing. The DCCC can make that back in one-hour selling Elizabeth Warren action figures to Planned Parenthood donors.

This race is over. Everything now is about saving face.

KEENDAWG.

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