Let's Go Double-Platinum Shorting Kanye West's Late Registration

There are people out there who think that Kanye West’s presidential campaign is getting Stronger. However, they are being 100 percent delusional if they think that they are going to be living The Good Life by betting on Ye to finish either 3rd or 4th in the upcoming election. Any College Dropout can understand why.

First of all, it is important to ask yourself who Kanye’s competition is in this election in order to establish how high-up he can finish. We know that unless America truly has a psychotic breakdown, Yeezy has a zero percent chance of finishing ahead of Joe Biden and Donald Trump. So 3rd place is his ceiling.

However, Kanye is also running against candidates from the Green Party and Libertarian Party. And even though these parties are only slightly more potent than a really gnarly meme campaign, they do have mailing lists, volunteers, donors, and political conventions that excite people and turn them out to vote. Kanye, on the other hand, has no party infrastructure at all and is basically relying on the fact that he is a celebrity who is off his meds to get people excited.

Then there are all of the Republicans in states like New York and California who don’t like Donald Trump but don’t want to vote for Joe Biden; and who know that their states are more in the tank for Democrats than CNN. These people are probably middle and upper-middle class professionals who are white; i.e., the picture-perfect profile of a Libertarian voter. They are not just going to throw away their votes on a walking, talking political meme like Kanye West. They’re going to vote for Jo Jorgenson.

Lastly, there is this issue: Kanye won’t even be on the ballot in a lot of states. For example, Texas, Florida, Colorado, and Michigan. When you consider that two of the three most populous states are on that list, it should tell you a lot about how intense of an uphill climb it’s going to be for Kanye to earn more votes than the Green Party — which is probably going to finish 4th in November.

Taking all of that in, this fact is obvious: Kanye’s absolute best possible finish is 5th place. Anything else is a Beautiful, Dark, Twisted, Fantasy. I’m going to be a Gold Digger and short him on both. You should too.